Over the holidays Dr. Killsmany met an untimely death.

The details are a bit sketchy but from what I hear it was over in a flash.

A part of me died with him that night.

The ward is buzzing with who may take his place. I'm hoping for one of the cute interns. A little eye candy goes a long way on the ward.

A man goes to the doctor's office one day.

Nurse Lol Mae, quite attractive, says, "The doctor is over at the hospital right now. He won't be back for about an hour. Could you tell me your symptoms, please?"

He tells her.

Lola Mae looks at him appraisingly and decides he's just tense.

She offers, "Well, um, for $50, I've got just the thing for you!"

He agrees, and she takes him into an examining room and screws the daylights out of him. About a week later, he returns, only to find that the doctor is there.

The doctor listens to the man's symptoms, examines him, and decides the man is just tense. The doctor writes out a prescription for a sedative and says,

"That'll be $150 for this visit." The man says,

"If it's all the same to you, doctor, I'd rather have the $50 cure!"

A man was in the waiting room filling out a questionnaire prior to having his stress test.

He was standing chatting with the receptionist as he completed the paperwork.

He told the receptionist he was here to "get me some of that Veeayra (Viagra) stuff but they are making me run for it".

His wife gasps and runs up to the desk where her husband is chatting with the receptionist.

She says, I have to go for tetanus shot.

"Oh my", replies the startled receptionist, "Did you cut yourself?" "HAH" she snorts,

"If he is going to crank up that rusty old piece of equipment I am going to need it!"

A man returns from the Middle East and is feeling very ill. He goes to see his doctor, and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo some tests.

The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings.

 "This is your doctor. We have the results back from your tests and we have found you have an extremely nasty STD called G.A.S.H.

It's a combination of Gonorrhea, AIDS, Syphilis, and Herpes!"

"Oh my gosh," cried the man, "What are you going to do, doctor?"

"Well we're going to put you on a diet of pizzas, pancakes, and pita bread." replied the doctor. "Will that cure me?" asked the man. The doctor replied,

 "Well no, but, it's the only food we can slide under the door."

Happy New Year all you hooligans.

Don't worry, I'll be back!!